Breaking DC News All Random All the Time All Entirely Made Up

The News at 11 Warhammer40k players takes to streets in Protest at New eldar Codex

Today a crowd estimated to be between thirteen and half a million started a protest in trafalgar square and announce there intention to March on Nottingham.

An anonymous source at Games Workshop said they weren’t worried as it would take weeks to get from London to Nottingham on foot and they were planning several new codex releases in this time that would cause equal amounts of Ned rage and should distraction them as they rush to there computers to Bitch

The official Games Workshop Press release read as follows

‘Fuck Off were not talking to you”

Unconfirmed reports are coming in that the crowd is already splitting into sub groups and engaged in long winded and insulting arguments.

We now hand over to our roving reporter who presents this live Broadcast from the Print shop of Games workshops Nottingham headquarters

Thanks DC we have had several eyewitness accounts that a break in had occurred in the early hours the morning before the Elder Codex went to.print a number of Lithographic plates were stolen and replaced Police have released this picture of there main suspect

matt-ward-mug

However when asked for a comment Games Workshop Released this statement

‘Fuck Off were not talking to you’

Thanks for that roving reporter In a breaking development it appears a small subgroups of the protesters describing themselves as hard core tournament players has split from the main group and started burning Wraith Knights and yelling about banning all elder players from all competitive games for ever more.

Asked to.comment Games Workshop released this statement

“Fuck Off were not talking to you”

They followed this with

“how do you keep getting in here”

Back in London a large sub group of protesters seem to have elevated a leader from amongst them

jervis-johnson

Describing themselves as rampant fluff bunnies they have announced there intention of forging the narrative regardless and have set off in pursuit of the competitive players determined to explain to them ad nauseum how there playing the wrong and are cheese beards who will destroy the game with there power mongering ways.

Asked for a comment Games Workshop Released this statement ” Fuck Off were not talking to you ”

This just in the fluff bunnies have caught up to the competitive group these disturbing images direct from tehbscene

greek-riots-1

Asked for comment Games Workshop Released this statement ” Fuck Off were not talking to you “

Advertisements

8 thoughts on “Breaking DC News All Random All the Time All Entirely Made Up

  1. How shit! That is the most GW has ever commented on anything! The new CEO has certainly turned the ship around and made nice with the media πŸ™‚ A regular chatty Cathy that one is!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. πŸ˜€
    Crazy Brits and their protesting ways.
    πŸ˜›
    I’m sure the march is losing steam, as a few dozen protesters peel off at every corner pub and/or hobby shop (those things need to be combined immediately. We’ll call it the HobbyBar…or Booze ‘n’ Game).

    Good to see GW engaging the community though.
    πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. While you have the whole new report thing down, I wonder at the objectivity of this report. GW responses in particular seem to be biased against full disclosure. Still, I find this news channel more reliable than most mainstream info-peddlers, will recommend to my friends!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Heya Merry I did extensive research at the relationship between media and objectivity and found that the two are on merely nodding acquaintance.
      Despite this I have attempted to represent GW’S position accurately and fairly

      Like

    • Hey Thuloid thanks for dropping by the Eerie

      Although at 6.30am on approximately 2hiurs sleep I am reluctant to engage a priest in a debate on the nature of reality I will paraphrase Sheldon Cooper.

      “Here squateth the toad of truth”

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s